"What pulls the rope in most workplaces is the elevation and promotion of self (ego), not the elevation of others, purpose, heart, and mind (soul). It's no wonder that people feel so alone in most workplaces today. Interconnectedness gets lost when you have a team or company of people who are making decisions based on their ego's needs: What would be best for their own personal goals, not their co-workers' goals; what would be best for their personal image, not their team's."
- Mike Metcalf & Shaun Peet, “12 Second Culture”
“Three eggs, over medium, cooked in olive oil if you can, please.” That’s what I said an hour into a breakfast meeting last week. I read somewhere that more olive oil is good for my cholesterol. I’m not sure if that is true, but I like the taste, and it reminds me of Spain.
My breakfast was with someone special. The kind of person who has succeeded at the highest levels but still shows up fully present and humble. Maybe you’ve met the type.
They don’t take their eyes off you or look at their phone. They spend more time listening than talking. They radiate care and love. Somehow, you feel like you got better after spending time with them - absorbing some of them. Two hours later, that’s how I felt. One lesson from him stood out:
Live on the margins, be the 1%
First, we aren’t talking about 1% in the context of money. We’re talking about mastery of your craft and your humanity. As we move through life, we use our experience and mental models to decipher the world and make decisions. Essentially, we apply a lens to each situation, and those lenses help us determine what action we take. What my new friend taught me is what I’d describe as the 1% lens.
In your mind, draw a large circle and write 80% in the middle of that circle with the word “most.”
Draw another circle around that first circle. Write 15% somewhere with the word “some.”
Then, draw another and write 4% and “very few.”
Finally, draw a final circle around those three circles and write 1% with the words “almost no one.”
You should have something like an inverted archery target, with 80% being a large inner circle and 1% being the outermost circle.
These circles represent the types of choices we make in the effort to get better. Most people will choose comfort. Some will do a little more. Very few will choose pain or possible failure. And almost no one is willing to go all the way out to the margin.
Choices:
Sleep in or workout
Scroll social or read a book
Roller bag or farmers carry a duffle bag
Shuffle emails or block four hours for deep work
Book another meeting or surprise your kid for an after-school ice cream date
Do that thing that scares you but puts at risk your status and resources
What would the 1% do?
Like you, I want to find my potential—as a professional and a human. To do that, I need to keep moving out to the margins. I need to go from doing what most will do to doing what almost no one will do.
The farther we go from the crowd, the scary it gets - it’s lonely out there. Potentially, it means being “weird,” looking foolish, failing, and asking for help. You can stay in that center, that comfortable 80%, or move out to that 1%. That’s where better happens - on the margins.
Put on those 1% glasses. Live on the margins, friend. Don’t do it for “me” do it for “we.”
I hope you’re good.
Take care, Kelly
PS - If you like this, please share it with a friend or your team.
Better Decision Making & Going To The Margin