Better Today Than Yesterday (BTTY)
Better Today Than Yesterday
Let's Be Complicated, Together
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Let's Be Complicated, Together

🎧 #22 | Listen Now (3 Min) | Why we are different and two things we can do today to help each other
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I took another personality test this week as part of my work. It was enlightening, scary, and chock-full of reality. Also, it clicked for me that we are all different. That may seem incredible, but it’s true. I think I understood it intellectually, but I see it now.

I’ve spent much time working on understanding myself, my motivations, and my why. I do this to try and be the best version of myself I can be. Buried deep are the reasons why I show up the way I do: money stories, admiration stories, and love stories.

The Lens We Create

These stories color my expectations of myself and others. They help create a lens through which I view life. This lens is contoured by the times when it went right and when it went sideways - by the celebrations and by the defeats.

We act differently and for different reasons. Even for the people closest to me, I’m still trying to figure out why they do what they do. And for myself, I’ve been around for 15,000 sunrises, and I’m only starting to let the water settle enough to see glimpses of my why.

Photo Credit: William R.

People Are Good

Most people want to wake up, be good, and do good things. They want their life to have meaning and purpose. They want joy and to enjoy. Unfortunately, it doesn’t always work out that way, and it’s not always their fault.

Now, I believe everyone needs to take responsibility for their actions and life — I also recognize a ‘why’ in every action. People don’t intentionally do a terrible job at work, cleaning their room, or communicating in relationships. Let’s not put them in a box, regardless of the label, and leave them there.

But People Are Complicated

Humans are complex, and we react to internal and external pressures. We do things we feel are correct at the moment but may look different in the rear view mirror.

Let’s complicate this further. 1 in 5 adults in the US live with a mental illness1, and 1 in 6 US youth aged (6-17) experience a mental health disorder each year2. Look around the room, the dinner table, or the screen - 20% probably need more help than you think.

Additionally, we’ve all had varying degrees of support throughout our lives. Different role models, levels of love, education, and privilege have shaped us. And in some cases, the complete absence of some or all of those. What do we do about it?

Let’s Be Complicated, Together

Here is the good news. There is more good in the world than bad. More people are inclined to help than hurt. It may not always feel that way, but it’s true. Here are two choices we can make.

  1. Assume positive intent. Decide they are doing their best. If you can help, help. If you can’t help, at least don’t hurt. You can apply this to yourself too.

  2. Ask for help. This is a sign of strength, not weakness - let’s not forget that.

I’ll leave you with this from Dale Carnegie:

Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain. And most fools do. But it takes character and control to be understanding and forgiving.

I hope you found this helpful, and if you did, please share it with someone else who might too.

Stay strong out there. Take care.

wonderful humans

1

https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/statistics/mental-illness

2

https://www.nami.org/mhstats

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Better Today Than Yesterday (BTTY)
Better Today Than Yesterday
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